For some reason, I have been keeping doing that every year, every single time.
Unlike you, I have little aspiration and almost no fantasy around her. I don’t even daydream about her. And considering all those that had happened, how brokenhearted would I be if I somehow fall for her?
But I’m glad I have been making her days once in a while. Which make all this but a short-term self-medicated relief of this life-long ailment.
For better or worse, she is slipping off my mind.
Everyone is slipping off my mind.
And remind me not to have any child. At all.
He effectively killed her the moment their lips landing on each others’.
What does a kiss say? A confession? A promise? Or a wish? It had never been clear what he tried to tell her in that moment, but it turned her twisted world even more upside down.
Loneliness is such a terrible disease. Ravaged, tainted, and torture her heart and mind. Only leaving her with thoughts to a man thousands miles away and the unclear words that had never been spoken.
And amidst that awkward silence of the time that she regretfully (to herself) agreed to see him face to face, the first one in a very long time, she was pushed even deeper into that conundrumous quantum that she had never been able to grasped.
Let make this self-reminder be very clear and straight forward: I have a so very very bad habit of giving concern to people who neither want nor need (and most of the times, don’t even deserve) it.
Steve: I hate your husband.
Claire: A lot of people do.
Steve: The past eight years I watched over him. But it wasn’t him I was watching. And every time I saw you, every time I heard your voice, all I could think to myself was ‘Jesus what I would give’… I can’t tell you how many times I thought about that.
Claire: You know what Francis said to me when he proposed? I remember his exact words. He said, ‘Claire, if all you want is happiness, say no. I’m not gonna give you a couple of kids and count the days until retirement. I promise you freedom from that. I promise you’ll never be bored.’
And you know, he was the only man, and there were a lot of others who proposed, he was the only one who understood me. He didn’t put me on some pedestal. He knew that I didn’t want to be adored or coddled. So he took my hand and he put a ring on it…because he knew I would say yes. He’s a man who knows how to take what he wants.
Haha người tình trăm năm ;)
I have never exactly thought about being together or in a relationship with you (that I have told you about), but at some point, I once believed that you would stay in my heart as long as I live.
Making all the recent stuff a bit more heartbreaking, isn’t it?
I have never felt so disillusioned.
Videogames suck. People are callous. Human relationships are shallow and calculative.
And we are going to remain silent for the rest of the time.
Feeling shockingly loveless and unromantic.
Till the day I make videogame for someone’s birthday instead of card.